Although it's hard to believe the weekend is gone already, it was definitely filled with life lessons. Funny how the little, simple things in life can really make you think and re evaluate.
This weekend, a friend of mine and I participated in a half marathon. This is something I have always dreamed of doing but never imagined it would actually happen. I have always been fast at running a very SHORT distance.... but long distance was never my thing. With a knee injury I obtained when I was around 13, and my asthma.... this seemed like an incredibly crazy idea. However, I signed up for it with no doubts, and started to train. The beginning of my training was rather disappointing. I could barely run to the end of the road without stopping a few times and being incredibly winded. There were many days I trained that I thought, "wow, there is no way I can do this." I was often very hard on myself and discouraged. The timing of my miles were certainly not anything to brag about..... along with the constant knee pain. A few weeks from the race, I discovered a running pace that seemed to help out a lot. That day, I ran 9 miles and for the first time, felt confident in the coming race.
The night before the race, I got about 5 hours of broken sleep.... then we woke up at 5 am to head to the train. Brett was incredibly supportive through this entire process and I'm not sure what I would have done without him. He thought the idea was rather crazy at first but never gave up on me. He even helped me train, often. He went with us to Chicago to support me in the race and even went on a food run for the two of us which was MUCH appreciated. He took Vera to the Shedd Aquarium and still found time to appear around the track a few times and was there at the finish line. I can't express how thankful I am for this man.
Which brings me to my next point...... since I had a lot of time to think in the 2 1/2 hours of running..... I really have an amazing husband. He has always been amazingly patient, understanding, and forgiving. I look up to him more than anyone else on this Earth. He is the kind of person I want to be. He is the kind of person I want my daughter to be JUST like. He keeps me going. He is my soul mate. I'm amazed at how many obstacles we've been through and how many bumps appear in the road from time to time. When I sit and think, I just know it would never, ever work with anyone else. And for those people who understand and accept that, I am thankful. I wish there were more people like that.
Our marriage has not always been easy, but it has ALWAYS been worth it. We really make the best team.... but most of that is thanks to Brett.
This weekend was just a wonderful reminder that 1. dreams can come true if you work for them. This applies to both the half marathon and my husband.... and 2. You really need to re evaluate your life and think about the people in it. Are there people who are bringing you down? People who don't respect you or who you are? People that want to change things about you that don't need to be changed? Maybe they aren't worth the space you have in your heart. Maybe they aren't worth the fighting, the pain, and the trouble.Life is SO short.... spend it with the people who make you happy. Use your time wisely.... reach those goals you've always wanted to reach. Don't be afraid of failing.... we learn from our mistakes. Life is worth living =)
This morning, I feel inspired to write.... but not on here, on actual paper. I was just trying to remember the last time I actually wrote to Brett. I know that I e mailed him a few times last week, but it's been awhile since I've written a letter.
When is the last time YOU wrote a letter to your significant other?
Why not do it today? Just to say thanks, or what you love about them.... or something really awesome they've done lately? If not your significant other, what about a close friend? A parent? A co worker?
Just an idea for this grey Monday morning =)
Have a great day!
Something has been on my mind lately, so I thought I would share.....
I just wanted to apologize to those of you who have ever felt bad about themselves because of me. Either about themselves, their choices, etc. I do realize that I have a very strong personality and am very opinionated. I realize that I don't always think things completely through before I say them. I realize that I think I'm right most of the time. I realize that there are "hot topics" that set me off or run me right into a verbal marathon. I know that I can sometimes be rude, unclear, sarcastic, and just all around unfriendly.
For all of that, I am very sorry.
The truth is, I am always researching. I am always reading. I am always looking to better my life and others. However, I don't stop to think that maybe others don't need my help? Maybe some people just need an ear to listen. I am a great listener, but I'm also a "fixer." I feel it's my duty to fix things often, and sometimes, they don't need fixed.
I know that my specific degree gives me a sense of entitlement, which not everyone may agree upon. The truth is, I just want to be someone people can be proud of. I want to be someone the younger generation can look up to. I'm not perfect, nor will I ever be.... but I want to be known as a good person. I don't want to be put in the judgmental category.... I want to keep a free and open mind about things. I want to be healthy. I want to make the right choices. However, the right choices for me, may not be the right choices for everyone else. I apologize if I have ever made you feel that YOUR choice is not the "right" choice just because I did not choose it. I am my own person. I want to be able to accept differences. After all, I wouldn't want everyone else to be like me. I annoy myself sometimes!
So do what you do.... be who you are..... lift each other up rather than putting each other down. This life is hard enough as it is without others bringing you down.
There are so many more things I want to do in life... so many things I want to be. My goals are different than yours. That's totally fine. Do what makes YOU happy and do what's right for you and your family. Just remember, I'll be here if you need me ;-)
Have a happy Friday, everyone!
Today, a friend and I were discussing nap time, and how it is often a wild and crazy time for us mothers. Children go from running/jumping/hollering/eating/drooling/crying/whining, to peaceful little souls whom you can't help but jump for joy once those little eyes are closed.
But what happens..... if that time is completely limited and just not long enough??? This, my friends, is our daily struggle.
To calm our nerves a bit, I started thinking about how COOL it would be to escape to a place where we could be WILD and CRAZY moms! And this is what I came up with......
We go to this place.... this quiet place. This place smells of fresh laundry. Not poop.
There are NO toys on the floor anywhere. You may walk in peace and far from fear of stepping on sharp objects.
All 3 meals are prepared for the day...... and you get to eat each one while it's still a comfortable temperature!
You get to shower! WHAAAAT? yes, I said it. No more vulgar aromas coming from your direction. Wash that stink away... and take longer than 5 minutes to do it. Maybe even SHAVE if you're feeling REAL wild.
Not only shower, but you get to go to the bathroom without an audience, at such place!
Now that you have eaten and showered, you can sit down and read that book/magazine/blog/etc. without it being knocked out of your hand.
How does that feel. Good? Alright... then wake up... because that my friend, is NOT the reality of a mother. It's a Mother Gone Wild! Real dangerous material we're working with, here!
Stress,
I may have posted about this before, but it's an important topic for sure. I have been feeling a lot of stress and pressure lately, myself. It's so hard to focus on the positive when you are stressed so much that you want to cry (or until you DO cry).
Just like with medicine (or pain reliever, to be more exact)... it's better to catch it early. Personally, I have a hard time catching myself before the point of falling. I let so many things happen until I can't take anymore. I promise myself that I will take frequent breaks so I wont get burnt out.... that almost never happens. Life certainly has a way of pushing you to your limits. I haven't found the magic wand to help this situation yet but I have been reading a lot about things to do and techniques lately and thought I would include them for those of you who are struggling like I am.
So here are a few things to try:
1. Take a break! If you're at work, go to the bathroom.... wash our hands, dab some water on your face. Breathe. If you're at home... lock yourself in your room for a bit. Breathe..... anywhere else? Close your eyes, breathe.
2. One thing that helps me? Dreaming. I LOVE to dream. I love to think of the possibilities in the future... I love to dream of projects we could do around the house, even if it will never happen. Sometimes just looking at a magazine or online browsing helps!
3. Take a shower. It's so funny how such a simple thing could bring so much joy.
4. Go to bed early. Give that brain of yours a break!
5. Indulge. SOmetimes, when I'm super stressed, eating a tiny piece of dark chocolate can lift my mood.
6. Spend time with friends and family. I live 4 hours away from all friends and family so I KNOW how tough it is sometimes to put life aside and have some fun, but it's NECESSARY. I did this recently and will never regret it.
7. Challenge yourself. Whether it's something like walking a mile after work, drinking 8 full glasses of water today, or just keeping yourself from crying.... when you're feeling really stressed, give yourself an obtainable goal for that day. Small and personal victories can really help the mind.
8. Resort to youtube. Sometimes, I just youtube some music that I love.... others, I will specifically look for funny videos. It works!
9. Talk to a friend. this is BY FAR my favorite "stress-easer." Normally, I find that just a simple vent about life helps me feel just a little less tense.
And finally:
10. Make someone ELSE feel better. It could be as simple as spotting someone in the store and pointing out their fabulous shoes! I usually find myself happier, if I'm making others happier.
And this, my friends, is MY very own list to help those in need. Feel free to comment below and add any that help YOU!
Don't be afraid to dream!
Dear Daughter,
Today, I have been quite emotional. I can't believe how much time has passed and what a little "lady" you've become in the past 2 1/2 years.
We had a really rough start. Our bond wasn't that great. We had a lot of complications in the "basic" baby necessities and didn't really connect until you were about one. I am not ashamed to say that although it WAS love at first sight, our bond didn't begin until much later. Breastfeeding, colic, and acid reflux were awful. The weekly weight checks with the doctor were draining. The constant feeling of failure was unbearable. I hated coming home each week and crying because you weren't gaining weight and the feeling that it was my fault. We cried together most days during your infancy. Sleep was something important to me, but not so important to you. Your cry and scream was so heart-shattering. Nothing I did seemed to help you. Every time I looked at you, I just felt as if I had failed and had no idea what I was doing, despite my many years of experience with infants.
My world definitely changed and was ROCKED on my 23rd birthday. Everything changed. My attitude changed, my perspective changed, my outlook on life... nothing in my mind remained untouched. Things were SO much harder than I ever imagined.
Today, I just look back and think, "how the heck did I ever make it through those lonely, stressful days by myself??" The truth is, I have no idea. Those days were SO tough. It makes me terrified of ever giving you a sibling.
With all that said, our bond has grown SO much in the last year and a half. You are my little mini-me. SO sassy, but so determined, so very smart, and so loving (most days). I love waking up in the morning knowing that you'll be in your room and we get to start a new day together. Although frustrating sometimes, I love that you give your dad a hard time at bedtime because you "want to see your mommy" while I'm out running. I am so proud of you and so lucky to have you in my life. I love watching you grow and seeing the things you are passionate about already. Although you drive me to want to pull out my hair most days, your smile and infectious laugh are both something to cherish. Your memory is just like your dad's but your attitude is just like mine. Although I fear for your teenage years, I know that you'll be just fine. Why? Because you're just like me already. You WILL drive people crazy... people will talk about you. Some wont like you... but that's ok. You will always have a special place in most people's hearts. You are going to be something big some day. You already are, to us. I can't imagine what great things you will accomplish in your life, but I can only hope that you will be proud of me and look up to us some day. You are EVERYTHING to us. We can't imagine a single day without you. I hope that you see our love for you when you're older.
I took a photo of you today (just as I always do)... that really captured my heart. You were holding your baby doll and "cooking" in your kitchen at the same time. I'm sure many people have pictures like this of their children in their collection... but I can't help but to think of it as such a special moment. I can only dream of the amazing nurturer you will be in the future. Whether or not you decide to be a mother some day, I know that your huge heart will shine on everyone you meet. I love watching you with your baby dolls. You are so gentle and caring with them. I can only hope that maybe it's a sign that I wasn't a terrible mother when you were a baby ;-) I know most nurturing attitudes come naturally, but I can't be certain that I didn't have anything to do with that.
Thank you for being my beautifully amazing daughter.
Do you ever just sit and think about time? It's so fast moving. Sure, while at work, time seems to creep by every day... but other days, I feel like I just woke up, and went straight back to bed.
Time flies so quickly that it's hard to remember to sit back and just take it all in. Everything is so rushed and busy... sometimes, we even take things for granted. Not just things though, people as well. Your family, your friends, your children.. even your animals at times.
Sometimes I just sit and think about all the blessings in life and how I'm so fortunate to just be able to pick up the phone and talk to most of the people I think about all day. Such a relief to know everyone and everything is alright just by a simple call/text/email/or post.
Most days I wake up and remember how lucky I am, but other days, I wake up in fear. I fear that I will lose the things most important to me. You never know when it's going to happen... or where... or why...
Knowing how fast time flies... why treat it as if there's always a tomorrow? Why not tell people TODAY how much they mean to you? Why live your life with regrets? I don't want to take people for granted.... I want people to KNOW I'm here, to KNOW I care, and to KNOW that I think about them, always.
So what are you waiting for? Have you taken a moment today to appreciate all the beautiful things life has to offer? Despite the hardships, downward spirals, etc.
SO do it... take a moment today to spread the love. Let people know you care, that you are thinking about them, that you are there for them!
Today is a beautiful gift. Embrace it!
